Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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