Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Randomize
