I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
