yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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