I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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