i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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