I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Randomize
