she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
