i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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