He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
