You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
