So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
