it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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