its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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