Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
