You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Randomize
