Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
