You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
