Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize