It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
