I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize