Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
