im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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