Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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