I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize