this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
