a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
The struggles of a small town man whore
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize