very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
