I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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