no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Who died my cat blue again?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize