Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize