another moral hangover. fuck.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
