all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
