pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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