There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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