did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
