Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
