Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
