Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
