chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize