He is an equal opportunity slut.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
