Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
