i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
