I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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