Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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