i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
