Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
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