I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize