Bisexual people are plain selfish.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
