Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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