Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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